Dear Families,
Thank you for taking time to visit our website! I hope you will find the information you need and support you desire. Parenting Across Color has been near and dear to my heart for many years as my family has grown through adoption. Through this group, I have grown as a person and as a mother. My boundaries have been altered and my comfort zone adjusted in order for me to become the mother my children need me to be. It is the greatest honor of my life to have Madison, McKenzie, and Morgan call me Mommy.
I became a mother for the first time in 2002 as foster parents. Our first placement was a six month old African American girl and my first thought upon receiving the news was “What will I do with her hair?” Can you believe that? In the first few days of being a mother to this little girl I realized how much I didn’t know about caring for a child of a different race. In all the training I received to become a foster parent, I had no idea how to care for the baby’s hair and skin.
I made a multitude of mistakes with our first placement. By the time our daughter, Madison, arrived, I had learned a thing or two about skin and hair, but I carried a tremendous amount of fear and anxiety about black mothers. I was so afraid a black mother would confront me in the parking lot of the grocery store and say, “Who are you to raise this child? What could you possibly know?” I eventually realized this scenario in my head had more to do with my parental insecurities than reality. I was, and continue to be, embraced by the black community and I look to black mothers all the time for advice and support and friendship.
Parenting a child of a different race is not easy. It definitely is not for the faint of heart. I would be completely lost without Parenting Across Color. Through this group I learned to comb hair, connect with a community to which I do not belong, recognize white privilege and confront racism when I see it. The members of this support group have celebrated with me when our family has grown, cried with me when children have left us, agonized with me when we sit at the mercy of the “system”, and generally helped me to grow as a person.
I truly hope every transracial family can find their way to such a supportive group as Parenting Across Color. And I hope this website will be the first step of that journey. All are welcome here just as you are. As white parents, we do not have the life skills and experiences are children must know in order to make their way in our race conscious world. We must rely on the kindness of strangers who eventually become friends to show us the way. Welcome.
Warmly,
Amy Ford
Program Director
Parenting Across Color
Parenting Across Color began in 2003 in Austin, TX at St. James Episcopal Church under the direction of Dr. Ruth McRoy, professor and researcher in the School of Social Work at the University of Texas, and Ora Ann Houston, community advocate and church member. Ruth and Ora noticed an increased number of transracial families attending services at St. James and decided to start a support group for parents to discuss issues of race and adoption. As an adoption researcher who has testified before Congress on the issue, Dr. McRoy brought to the group the latest studies, articles, and reality checks of parenting across the color line. Ora Ann Houston brought a lifetime of experience in the African American community and a passion for activism. Both of these ladies were essential to the success of the group. Together they created a safe environment in which difficult conversations could take place with honesty, respect, and love.
The group has met on a monthly basis since 2003, offering parents a supportive environment in which to grow and learn, as well as the opportunity to hear speakers on the topics facing our families. In 2005, Dr. McRoy moved to California and Amy Ford, a charter member of the group, took over as facilitator. The group changed its name from Transracial Parenting Group to Parenting Across Color and partnered with Lutheran Social Service’s Post Adoption Unit to provide support and education to families throughout Central Texas. Occasionally, social activities took place, but the primary reason for meeting was to support one another. Members included white parents who had adopted or were fostering children of other ethnicities.
In 2009, Amy Ford incorporated the group as the first step to become a non-profit organization in order to secure additional funding. A board of directors was assembled, a mission statement created, and a vision was shared for a world where every child has a family in which they are loved, respected, and honored. The group continues to grow and evolve in order to meet the needs of the transracial families in Austin, TX. Requests for support groups in other parts of the country have been received and plans are in the works to create a system to open charters in other cities.
Dr. Ruth McRoy, Ora Ann Houston, and St. James Episcopal Church continue to be strong supporters of the efforts of Parenting Across Color. The plans for the future are exciting and lengthy given the lack of training and support for the Anglo families adopting children of color across the nation. Parenting Across Color is dedicated to sharing the experience, strength, and hope of transracial families with those still feeling their way in the dark.
Dr. Rowena Fong
Kenneth Thompson
Kay Fowler
Lacey Shawn
Jennifer Graf
Amy Ford
Bruce Alexander
Mia Sneed
